EPISODES

Okay, here is part 2 of this very episode of The Rusty Playground. Why "very special"? Well, because, as mentioned last episode (you should have been paying attention!), these 4 Christmas episodes were done during Mattyman and Vannyboy's first attempt at this little podcast. It was too much work, so we switched up.

In this very special old episode of The Rusty Playground, Mattyman and Vannyboy continue their never ending talk about the Christmas toys that we had growing up. Great stuff. Fun stuff. Dangerous stuff. But we wouldn't have it any other way.

So, like you dared your little brother to do that time he climbed up on the roof, take a dive into this classic episode. We put our best into. Sure, the best isn't good enough, but I dare you to do better! I double dog dare you!

If you want to experience this episode on YouTube, follow this link - ⁠https://youtu.be/eAR4ERqHgeU⁠

And while you’re at it check out our website for more stupid Gen-X goodness - https://therustyplayground.com

Boogalooing electrically,
Mattyman and Vannyboy

Okay, what is going on, Mattyman and Vannyboy? Why is this episode so special? Why is it so different than the previous 14?

Easy answer, we say to all 3 of you!

This is an episode from our previous attempt at our little The Rusty Playground podcast. In those early years, Mattyman and I would do our thing, make our lists, and talk for 6 hours. Then, I would go in and edit the episode. Apart from editing out burps, farts, and more farts, I got it in my mind to add soundbites and the like. The result, while entertaining, took approximately 7,843 hours per episode to edit. So, having the work ethic of your average Gen-Xer, I said "Shit on that."

So, we decided to just stop all that silly nonsense and just chat about the subject at hand, go of on tangents, and just leave the editing to a minimum. It is a LOT more fun for us because it's just like the two of us sitting in GRC dorm at VCU, drinking beer and shooting the shit. It's a LOT more fun for me, Vannyboy, because it doesn't take forever per episode. I'm lazy. Sue me.

In these following 4 very special episodes, Mattyman and Vannyboy bring you the best of Generation X toys.

Recorded in 2022, this was initially planned out to be one episode. Oh, we were just sweet summer children back then! It ended up being 4 episodes that I finished editing, and there was enough for another 3 episodes left over! I'm not kidding. The effort almost ended the podcast. Mattyman and I got into a huge fist fight, with me edging the fight out with 627 punches to Matty's 3. So we switched thing up to what we have now.

So, enjoy these very special very special Christmas episodes from several years ago as Mattyman and Vannyboy take some much needed time off from our grueling schedule of 14 episodes a year.

Dig in, enjoy, and don't expect anymore like this outside of these four! I've already told you...I'm lazy! True.

Smoke 'em up, Johnny!
Mattyman and Vannyboy

Rustheads,

What band had the coolest intro to a concert ever?
What band had the coolest image for a rock band ever?
What band has sold the most merchandise of any band?

What band has had a career spanning 40 years that still sells out stadiums and has their music played at sporting events?

If you answered "KISS", then you are either a Gen-Xer, or read the title of this episode. Either way...YOU'RE RIGHT!

Paul Stanley, Gene Simmons, Peter Criss, and Ace Frehley started out just wanting to be a rock and roll band to make good music, get lots of chicks, and make some moolah. Well, over the past nearly half of a century, they made a lot of good music, got loooooooooots of chicks, and made loooooooooooooooooooooooots of money! So, good on them.

Perhaps no other band has solidified themselves into the Generation X zeitgeist quite as much as KISS. Their image, their logo, their merch, their anthems...there simply is not an American Gen-Xer who couldn't recognize them within 0.00154 seconds of seeing even a hint of one of their famous character designs. And woe be to the poor bastards that couldn't pick out "Rock and Roll All Night", "Beth", or "I Was Made For Loving You" in less than 4 notes. Matter of fact, it’s making me sick just thinking about those poor bastards.

Give me a moment, please.

Okay, I’m back, and so are Mattyman and Vannyboy in this very special episode of The Rusty Playground! Join us as we leap back to the early 70s, jump over to the 80s, then limp forward towards the 90s and rediscover one of the biggest bands of all time. Listen as we wax poetic about our experiences growing up wanting to be an androgynous star child with the coolest black eye ever, a hunching demon that pukes blood, a cackling space alien, or a pussy drummer!

If you’d rather watch our fun logo as you listen on YouTube, here it is https://youtu.be/Z9rL0rhtAss.

If you want to listen the way God intended, through Spotify, go here https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/the-rusty-playground-podc/episodes/Ep--14---KISS-e2qen7o.

Otherwise, check out our website, www.therustyplayground.com for all our episodes and even the occasional blog.

Rocking and rolling all night and sleeping every day,

Mattyman and Vannyboy

 Rustheads!

Quick! Name three television stars!
Quick! Name three television shows!
Quick! Name three television networks!

See? Wasn't that easy? Now, hold that thought for 40 years, then ask your friends if they remember any of the people, shows, or networks you just mentioned! Of course they won't. Possibly because the passage of time sweeps unimportant information away from the cultural zeitgeist. Also possibly because, like us, you have no friends.

Well, that is the task Mattyman and Vannyboy set for themselves in this episode.

Let's go back to a simpler time. A time when we had only 3 TV channels, called "networks". A time when those networks got together to have a competition between their d-tier nighttime lineup "stars". A time when it seemed like smoking on tv right before your relay race was a very, very legitimate way to calm your nerves before "battle"!

What did the brilliant executives and marketing experts of the day call this?

The Laugh Olympics!

Just kidding. I was called "Battle of the Network Stars", of course! Don't overthink things.

Listen as Mattyman paints a tapestry of imagery describing the beauty and splendor of Malibu, California, as seen through a 27" television with 320x460 pixel resolution.

Ponder as Vannyboy pontificates the majesty of unforgettable star power, such as Barbara Parkins, John Schuch, and Victor French.

Flatulate as we ask such nail-biting questions such as "will 6'6", 265lbs former NFL Defensive End, Bubba Smith, blind-side 5'3", 123lbs JoAnn Willette in the 3-on-3 football competition", "will Michael J. Fox ask Dack Rambo if that is his actual stupid name", or "will they run out of cocaine before Joan Van Ark gets the clumsy inflatable kayak around that buoy"?

HAHAHHA!! Just kidding! This was the 70s and 80s in Hollywood...the cocaine NEVER ran out!

So, strap in, get ready to either laugh, love, or become lethargic.

OH! And we have another skit...err...dark web thingy, as well as a new department: "Mattyman's Totally Not AI Generated Song Relating To Today's Topic".

We'd rather be in the Laugh Olympics,
Mattyman and Vannyboy

Succa Rustheads!

Well, here we are, folks, FINALLY at the end of our romp through The Big Four, this time with the ever amazing A-Team! And by “ever amazing” we mean “pretty cool for the first two seasons then it had a serious drop off”, but if you say that, I pity you.

Join us, Mattyman and Vannyboy, as we stumble through our clouded and distorted memories of a show that redefined television excellence, The A-Team. And by “redefined television excellence” we mean “kinda was good sometimes, looking back”. And if you don’t agree, you’re a fool.

The A-Team was a vehicle for Mr. T, a friendly and jovial chap with no distinctive look or style whatsoever. And if you believe that, I pity you and you’re a fool.

This episode is the final episode in our series, The Big Four, and, believe it or not, we actually went into this “Big Four” recording thinking we would only have one episode. That makes Vannyboy a fool and Mattyman someone to be pitied.

If you would rather listen to this podcast on Spotify, visitTHIS LINK

If you would rather watch this on our YouTube channel, visit THIS LINK

Pitying all the fools,
Mattyman and Vannyboy

Unrustable Rustheads!

Why do we say “unrustable”? Is it because Gen-X’s ever increasing metal joint replacements? Maybe. But more likely it’s because K.I.T.T., half of the subject of this episode, is made of a special molecular bonding which can’t rust and is super dense. The same could probably be said of the car’s co-star, David Hasslehoff!

Let’s head out to the highway with Mattyman and Vannyboy as they wax poetic about this show with cheap special effects, contrived plots, cheesy action, and impossible (even today) technology, Knight Rider!

This is part 3 of our take on what we like to call “The Big Four”, the big four Gen-X-pre-teen smash TV hits that helped shape our childhoods. God, what a sad statement…

Anyway, put the pedal to the metal, rev up that V8, and let your stuntman listen to this episode:
Ep. 11 - The Big Four - Part 3 - Knight Rider. If you’d rather listen on Spotify, go here: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/the-rusty-playground-podc/episodes/Ep--11---The-Big-Four---Part-3---Knight-Rider-e2kotnv

If you want to watch our logo as you listen on YouTube, go here: https://youtu.be/UHaudKeXVqY

Talking to our watches,
Mattyman and Vannyboy

Greatest American Rustheads!

Believe it or not, we're walking on air in this very special episode of The Rusty Playground!

Join Mattyman and Vannyboy as they use their unpredictable super powers to go back in time and talk about everyone's favorite curly headed, blonde, bumbling super hero: The Greatest American Hero.

This is part 2 of our discussion on what we like to call "The Big 4": four of the most influential (or at least memorable) action shows custom made for Gen-X boys. Last episode was ⁠The Dukes of Hazzard⁠, and this show is Ralph, Bill, and the rest of the gang. And by "gang" we mean "troubled teens who are actually thirty", that's just how troubled they are.

So, lose the instructions, tighten your cape, change your name or underwear for a couple of months, and join us on this journey of wackiness, won't you? 

Not Joey Scarbury,
Vannyboy and Mattyman

Yeehaa, Rustheads!

On today's very special episode, we kick off a series we like to call "The Big 4". We like to call it that because that's what it's called. And why is it called that? Because we named it, that's why! Circular logic, baby!

In short, The Big 4 is what we call the top 4 most impactful shows that we had during our impressionable youth. Those are:

- The Dukes of Hazzard
- The Greatest American Hero
- Knight Rider
- The A-Team

We started out with the plan to make one episode where we talk about all 4 but, unlike Hannibal Smith, not all of our plans come together! So we broke each show up into its own episode so we can deep diver and get into the meat of these incredible shows. Okay, there wasn't a lot of meat, we admit, but it was fun!

So put your 1969 Dodge Charger into gear, make squealing noises on the dirt (somehow), and get ready to jump the gorge of ignorance in this episode all about...The Dukes of Hazzard!

Loving our 6th spinal compression fracture,
Mattyman and Vannyboy

Ayyyeeeee Rustheads!

In this very special episode of The Rusty Playground, we revisit and old chestnut from back in the day: Happy Days.

Yep, we will talk about the amazing effect that The Fonz had on our dating lives and The Cunninghams had on our family lives and on how Potsy had on our closeted lives (not that there's anything wrong with that)! Learn how to cope with the terrible issue of losing a brother and never having him mentioned again, and how that actually turned into a Hollywood idiom. Also, learn what an idiom is! Just kidding...we don't know.

Most importantly, learn how to snap your fingers and get the clap.

Hop on your motorcycles, put on your leather jackets (all of them), and fist the jukebox of your life (that didn't sound right...I'm such an idiom!), and let's get rocking and rolling.

Sitting on it,
Vannyboy and Mattyman

Well, Rustheads, we are back at it. Finally!

In this very special episode we stick with the "movies of 1982" theme from last video, only this time focusing on two specific movies: Blade Runner, and John Carpenter's The Thing.

Both of these genre-defining masterpieces came out on the same day. Let that sink in...THE SAME DAY. We are lucky to get ONE movie every 10 years that match these movies in awesome, but back in 1982, we got a double dose of mind-bending existentialism. Not to mention they came out TWO WEEKS after E.T., another once-in-a-generation movie. Man...the 80s were just awesome!

Join Mattyman and Vannyboy as they try, and fail, to keep their conversation below an hour and a half.  We cut probably 35 minutes of our conversation to fit it into 1:32 of informational mind-melting-mayhem. Most of that time may or may not have involved  plastic tubes filled with water and the clicking of Bic lighters. We hope you appreciate our sacrifice. If you would rather experience this on YouTube where you can see our fun little logo (that changes with each episode), then ⁠click here⁠!

Waiting here for a little while to see what happens,
Vannyboy and Mattyman

Yo, yo, yo, Rustheads!

In this very special episode of The Rusty Playground, Mattyman and Vannyboy discuss some (but not all) of the movies of 1982.

It's hard to argue that 1982 wasn't the best year ever for movies, and impossible to argue it's not the best year for movies for Generation X. From crap you'll see on Mystery Science Theater 3000 a decade later, mediocre popcorn crunchers you'll love as you turn your brain off, or straight up genre-defining masterpieces, 1982 had it all!

Join us as we stroll down memory lane, wondering where we are and how we got on this lane. Also, we will talk movies and be as equally shocked at how many of these movies Vannyboy has seen as we are how many Mattyman has not!

If you’d rather listen to it on the YouTubes, check this episode out HERE.

Phoning home,
Mattyman and Vannyboy

Hey Rustheads!

We are back with the second half of the latest very special episode of The Rusty Playground, still focusing on the greatest tv show of all time: Mystery Science Theater 3000! ⁠Check out the 1st episode here.⁠

In this episode we will break down some of the top episodes of MST3k, some of the big moments during the show, and even found some old tapes of the effect that MST3k had on young Mattyman and Vannyboy. So rev up your inner smartass and jump aboard the Satellite of Love with us! Also, you can find ⁠this episode on YouTube,⁠ if you are that kind of weirdo! 

Watching out for snakes,
Mattyman and Vannyboy

Hello again, dear Rustheads!

We return to the interwebs with a very special episode of The Rusty Playground. This time we riff about what we consider the greatest television show of all time: Mystery Science Theater 3000!

We decided to release this episode because a] we made it and b] wanted to release it during the annual ⁠MST3k Turkey Day Marathon⁠, which is a national holiday in here on the Playground!

Join us as we break down the origin of the show, some of the key players, and, oh yeah, tell you what the show even is, if you don't know. And if you don't know, why are you alive??!?!!

This episode had to be broken into 2 parts, so be sure to check out the second part HERE. Also, if you would rather check it out on YouTube, click HERE.

Waiting to kill that fat barkeep,
Mattyman and Vannyboy

Rustheads!

Remember when you would go to both sets of grandparent's houses and engorge your gullet with glutton and gluten? We do! And we will tell you all about it as long as we can stay on track for once! But don't hold your breath!

Sit back, unbutton your pants, feel your anus pressurize, and regret being alive as we take stock in the days when we went to grandparents houses instead of, like now, being the grandparents who's houses (and toilet) get wrecked!

Join us as we take a hazy look back at crowded rooms, too much food, and distant relatives on this very special episode about our Thanksgiving Day Shenanigans in the cleverly titled Episode 3 - TurkeyDay Shenanigans!

You can also check it out on ⁠YouTube if you prefer.

Offering a wafer-thin mint.
Mattyman and Vannyboy

Welcome, fellow Rustheads, to yet another episode of The Rusty Playground.

This time Mattyman and Vannyboy reminisce about Halloween for Gen-X, which admittedly for us, was the 1970s-very early 80s. Other Gen-Xers will have different timelines, but they ain't running this show, so it's about us!

Join us on this fun little jaunt about candy, costumes, circus peanuts, and Peanuts as we delve into the mysteries of the universe. Well, not really. Just talking candy and stuff. But there is a classic bit where Mattyman and Vannyboy recorded themselves with a tape deck in the late 70s, about 11 years before they actually met. Don't worry, it will be explained. Sort of.

Also, check out the podcast on ⁠YouTube ⁠if you would like. It's the same thing, but with a cool picture of our logo!

So, grab a pillowcase, throw on your thick plastic mask, and carry a heavy basket as we take a look back at Spooky Season, Gen-X Style.

Boos and Blah-Blah-Blahs,
Mattyman and Vannyboy

Welcome To The Playground is the inaugural release to the reboot to our fun little Gen-X-centric podcast.

Join Mattman and Vannyboy as we explore the ups and downs, lefts and rights, forwards and backwards, and all diagonals of growing up in the coolest generation.

In this episode we just set up what this podcast is all about...talking about Generation X (a.k.a. Latchkey Kids, The MTV Generation, the Lost Generation). Mattyman and Vannyboy bring their own unique take and humor to each subject.

We are not here to tell other generations how much they suck. We are here to talk about how awesome ours is. Everyone is welcome on the playground.